I hit a pedestrian. Or, more, a pedestrian hit me.
It all sounds rather Rory Gilmore but seriously; it wasn't my fault. I was riding in the rain which already spelled trouble. Plus, I was riding through the city which- not to invoke Macbeth but here I go- spelled double trouble. My brakes had already proved practically useless when cars crossed into the bicycle lane just for kicks (oh, how I adore those little two-tonne scamps!) so I was going pretty slowly to avoid, you know, dying.
I'm coming up on Melbourne Central where the traffic lights are problematic and the pedestrians jaywalk like nobody's business. And suddenly, despite his red light and my green one, a pedestrian steps out in front of me while looking in the opposite direction. Smack! I must have been thrown neck first into this guy because shortly afterward I started coughing and feeling like I couldn't breathe. Aside from my life threatening winding, though, I was pretty worried about him. But he was still standing and as soon as I asked him if he was okay he'd asked me about five times and was still going. We just reassured each other for about thirty seconds that we were both fine, whereupon he kept walking across the road and I sat there in the rain waiting for the green light to return to me, its passionately lonely former lover.
Once we were reunited, I continued riding and let the soreness set in after the adrenaline wore off. My life is so interesting and fun.